This business of being still is hard. I find it easy to crash with a blanket and a cup of coffee, but not to be still. I can zone out. Ramble. Daydream. But active listening? That is hard work. Pastor Rick issued a challenge on a recent Sunday morning: Spend two minutes every day listening for God’s voice.
I tried it this morning. Jon went off to work. All four boys were still in bed. The house was quiet. Perfect. A little coffee, a little computer, a little Bible, some prayer, and here we go.
ZzzZZZZzzzzzzzzzzz.
Whoops! Try again… Being still. Listening for God.
Guide To Dinosaurs. I can’t wait to read that! Why is that crummy Ebay box still sitting there? Guitar lessons tomorrow. Did anyone practice? Why doesn’t the fabric in my book basket touch the bottom of the basket? So annoying. The birthday balloons are still up. Ha! The deflated one looks like a mango.
Wait a minute! God time! Was that two minutes? Five, actually. Eyeroll. Forehead slap. Try again.
Silence. Thinking about God. And the bus that’s idling at the bus stop outside. Move along, pal! I’ve got kids sleeping here. This is my God time! This floor is so dirty! Did we sweep yesterday? There’s so much dog hair blowing around, you could make a scarf for winter. Do the boys have snow pants?
ARGH!
Maybe it doesn’t bother the Lord. It didn’t bother me when my kids took a while to learn how to tie their shoe laces. I understood when handwriting came along slowly. Good things take time – like the process of teaching four boys NOT to interrupt. So slow. Think sloths ballroom dancing. But they WILL get it. With persistence and patience, they will get it. So will I.
In the meantime, I read in Psalm 37 that the Lord laughs. Verses 12 + 13: “The wicked plot against the godly; they snarl at them in defiance. But the Lord just laughs, for he sees their day of judgment coming.” I see “…the Lord just laughs.” If He can laugh at people who think they’re not accountable to Him, seeing the final judgment complete and everything made right before that time comes, then I’m sure He laughs at my feeble attempts to obey. He is more than happy to “lead me along right paths, bringing honor to his name.” (Psalm 23:3)
So. I will take baby steps to quiet listening again next time. And when I start contemplating fantasy football by accident, I will laugh with my Maker. Come to think of it, I would love to hear Him laugh!
