Ask, Seek, Knock … Small right steps.
“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. “Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone?”
I am a creature of habit. When times get tough, difficult, challenging, my default mode is to wall up and hunker down. My basic goal is small, right steps. As the challenges begin (much like early labor stages), I am prepared. I unpack the bag I carry to get me through… the Word, prayer, and HIS people. I settle in and focus on what is good, leaving the pain and challenge to the One that promises to do the heavy lifting.
Time and pressure are not my friends. I find myself sidetracked by circumstance. In my weakness I feel overwhelmed. I shift my focus and lapse into shut down, hold on. My focus becomes small, right steps. If the steps include prayer, fellowship, HIS word, I can tread water fairly easily. The days tick by, challenges continue to grow, and my small right steps change.
Is there food in the house? Did I take a shower? Do I really need to make the bed or do laundry? I shift into hold on, get through, survive mode. Treading water becomes more and more difficult. I am weary.
As long as I do not fall too low, I tell myself I am fine. If I look ok, I am OK. At this point one of two things happen. I turn back, grab onto HIS promises, use the tools HE gives me, and begin thriving with renewed purpose and energy. Or I fall deeper, make my steps smaller and less right until I end up so low that all I can do is surrender and beg HIM to make a way where I can no longer make one myself.
Like a breath of fresh air, HE meets me where I am … AGAIN. HE picks me up, holds me close. Loves me in my perceived failure. My eyes are open again. My focus is reset. Romans 8:1 reminds me that there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. HE knows my pattern, my path and loves me enough to meet me there – as soon as I call.